I received a message today that didn't sit right with me. It felt condescending. I was being micromanaged. I really dislike that immensely.

I was feeling all the feels. Mad. Frustrated. Angry. I was asking myself, "When would they see that I was already doing what they wanted? Why were they assuming I wasn't already doing it? Why were they assuming I even needed to be told?

It's like that manager we all had at some point who treated you like you were incompetent while on a power trip. That's exactly what it reminded me of and is the best way I can describe it. I think we have all had someone like that in our lives.

I picked up my phone to respond, and I heard myself say, "Don't let them know they got to you." They'll think you're a bitch if you speak up and say something. Just let it go."

I noticed this part of me that said, "Never let them see they're hurting you or bothering you, and they'll stop. Don't give them the satisfaction of letting them know they got to you."

After a few minutes of me trying to talk myself down, though, something still wasn't sitting right with me. And that's when I noticed something was up for me.

When I say something was up for me, I mean this is more than just what a person said to me. This was related to something deeper within me.

So I did what I teach my clients to do inside my program, From Freeze To Flow, when we notice something is up for them. We dive in with curiosity to see what is really going on.

I grabbed my notebook and took myself through the questions I take my clients through because I live this work every day too.

I got out my notebook and started noticing where in my body I was feeling these feelings. I felt nausea in my stomach. I felt this tingle go all the way up the back of me, where my spine is up to my throat. It felt tight in my throat. As I asked myself more From Freeze To Flow questions, I noticed tingling in my lips (a sure sign of speaking up for me), and a bracing for impact feeling in my left shoulder. A ping in my hip and thigh.

My body was saying a lot.

That's when I saw an image of me as a little girl being pushed off the swings by a bigger kid at the park behind my house. I was with a friend who was older than me, but she didn't say anything to help me. I felt like I didn't belong. And even back then ( which tells me this is in my lineage), I didn't let them see I was upset. I walked away. I couldn't have been more than 3, maybe 4 years old at the time.

So when I got this message this morning, it activated/triggered me. My body wasn't trying to upset me; she wanted to bring forward this part of me that wanted to be seen and heard. To be healed.

I asked her, "What do you need from me? And she said, "Speak up, girl, and remove access to the people who mistreat you. Even more than that, they believe they are entitled to mistreat you. Don't let them."

So I blocked 2 people on FB, and I responded to the person with the condescending message lovingly and let them know that they could rest easy knowing that I was already doing the things they were asking as we had previously spoken about.

Reader, IT FELT SO GOOD TO DO THESE THINGS! I WAS SO EXCITED! It felt so good to let this part of me be seen and let her know I will protect her, and it's not letting them win. It's letting them know that their behavior won't be tolerated and that they will lose access to me.

Sometimes speaking up is confused with being a bitch, but what speaking up actually is is you deciding that you won't tolerate that behavior or that you won't settle for less than what you deserve. You're choosing your worthiness over acceptance. You choose your worthiness over belonging somewhere you don't belong.

P.S. When people "push us off a swing," they're telling us, "Around here, this is how you will be treated." Choosing your worthiness over their acceptance is where you actually find belonging.

That's not being a bitch. That is deciding. And deciding is the FIRST STEP TO EVERYTHING YOU WANT!

Today, for me, deciding was replying to the message, speaking up lovingly for myself, and letting the person know I was already doing that. It was also blocking people who have proven they don't deserve access to me.

Reader, if this sounds like something you would love to have support with, reply DECIDE to this email and let's talk because there's a whole other conversation your body is having with you and it's ready to be heard!

P.S. Knowing when it's time to speak up and knowing what decisions are right for you comes from your body. Those answers are inside you, not outside. Knowing how to hear what your body is saying is your next step. Reply to this email and let's dive in!
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Sending you so much love and support Reader,

🌟🌟Jess's Testimonial🌟🌟

"I’ve learned how to identify what aligns with my values, when to say “yes” with intention, and how to say “no” with confidence and WITHOUT guilt."

"Laurie is an amazing person and an incredible coach.

Starting her life coaching program was truly one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. It has transformed my life in ways I never thought possible.

Before working with Laurie, I struggled with saying “no,” constantly overcommitting, and ignoring my own needs. I often said “yes” out of guilt or fear of disappointing others.

One of the biggest shifts for me has been finding my voice, not just speaking up, but truly recognizing that my voice matters. Laurie helped me see that I have the right to express myself, to take up space, and to make choices that honor who I am. I used to feel like I had to please everyone. Now, I show up for myself with confidence and clarity.

Through thoughtful guidance, practical exercises, and compassionate accountability, Laurie helped me understand the value of my own time and energy. I’ve learned how to identify what aligns with my values, when to say “yes” with intention, and how to say “no” with confidence and without guilt.

One of the biggest breakthroughs for me was learning to set and hold boundaries both in my personal life and at work. Laurie didn’t just tell me what to do; she helped me discover how to do it in a way that felt natural and empowering.

I now feel more in control of my decisions and more aligned with who I want to be. If you’ve been people-pleasing, struggling to be heard, feeling unseen, or unsure how to stand in your truth, Laurie will help you find your way back to your voice and to yourself.

If you're dealing with burnout or just feeling stuck, I can’t recommend Laurie enough."

-Jess

Not sure how you got here?

You're a current or past client, or you signed up for one of these. Money Energy Audit, Money Making Mantras, 5 Steps To Declutter Your Brain, Manifesting 101 With Laurie 5-Day Challenge, My Money Tracker, 3 Shifts To Unblock Your Abundance, How To Say No With Love SO You Can Lovingly Enforce Your Boundaries, The YES/NO Challenge, a Vision Board Workshop, or a free workshop I hosted!

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